Hilary

Here is where the aforementioned decrease in productivity really starts to kick in. Somehow the combination of a Christmas holiday and the impending fear of a little thing called Finals reduced poetic output to almost zero. Therefore all two of the poems for Hilary term are right here. All two of the poems for Trinity will follow next post, and then, well, who knows.

Jimmy. Jimmy knows.


To Read or not to Read

To read or not to read
(for your collection)
That is the question

Even if you choose 'to be'
And get thee to a library
Whether or not it's nobler in mind,
I think you'll find the arrows will sting;

Should you fail to pass, by the college, your ass will be placed in a sling.

If by fortune outrageous, on turning those pages
You find you aren't able to answer a thing
You'll wish you were dead
Or sleeping in bed
As tick after tock echoes down from clock
With each one you feel a quite unnatural shock
And don't you dare doubt me
When I say you'll devoutly
Be wishing perchance for the bad dream to stop

As you stare in despair at your answer sheet bare
Like everyone else the temptation is there
Just utter a prayer
Get up from your chair
And exit as if you're pursued by a bear

It seems either way you'll be dead for a ducket
So suck it up, pluck up the courage to chuck it
And (quoting from Shakespeare himself) "just F...orget about revision"


And on to the single JCR Meeting poem I managed to knock out. I am pleased that I did, as the new president and VP have since proved most deserving of...well of a spoof gangsta rap performed inexpertly by a white middle class Oxford student with little or no knowledge or indeed liking for the genre. Oh, and it is important to note (else the final line makes even less sense) that we had just found out that Corpus was loosing its sports pitches in a cost-cutting measure. Now read on.


JCR Meeting - Rap

Ladies and Gents take your pizza and places
Let me introduce our two new faces
It’s out with the old and in with the new
Cos this JCR’s back with a brand new crew

Now our President and VP are two guys which is
Nice cos the ones we had before were both b...eautiful ladies
Yead ladies, not bitches, cos that shit is sexist
And the equal opps team would’a had me for breakfist
All I’m sayin’ is it’s a nice break from precedent

Meanin’ no disrespec’ to our previous president
But her reign came to and end last term
So now that she’s gone it’s her boyfriend’s turn
Though it’s not like Seb needs our help or our pity
He’ll be just as tough, but a little less Preeti

And just in case meetings get boring or drab for us
Jim’ll be here to keep everything fabulous
So I’ll hand over this mike on the count of three
To our MC CCC JCR Committee
Oh and now that our years with a sports ground are done
I got 99 problems but a pitch ain’t one